I posted a quote this AM about praying that the tears we cried in 2019 will water the seeds we plant in 2020! I must share for those of you that think your life is rotten. We all go through times like that. Last night while talking to a friend checking in on me while I am sick. I told her 2019 was slowing lowering my anxiety level with Mr. Shabby, I was starting to trust him after all these years, trust us. It was a rocky year with him in rehab the whole year, well until September 2019.
I told her that 2020 as of last night had not been here for 2 weeks and I had sold my home of 15 years, found an apartment, been sick as I could be and at the doctor twice for it in 2020. The script then flipped and was sent by a wonderful friend to see a financial advisor. Who said no, it would not be in your best interest to move and use any of your assets from the home. I would need all of that equity money to put down on a small Garden Home in the next year or so, good Lord willing.
So, I had lived alone for almost 3 years, Mr. Shabby wanted to get clean stay clean show me he loved only me and move away from this home and start over in the latter part of 2018 he went to rehab with full support from me and all of his family. As I said 2019 was starting to feel better, my trust was building, but, not totally there, not sure it would have ever been totally, once you have lived in it for years, but, God can change ALL things. I thought this was it for us in our older years, the man I once loved so very much.
Life has a way of just showing up at the door and you deal with it. Or at least that’s the way mine has gone all my life. I can say that in the year, the 2 weeks of 2020 it’s been life as usual a whirlwind. I have asked God to show me the way He wants me to go. I’ve told myself over and over that life is what you make it. For me, it is like taking a piece of metal and bending it with my bare hands. I am such a creature of habit. I think it is time for this old dog to learn some new tricks, by tricks I mean a new way to do life. To allow me the right to make a mistake but correct it right away. To lean more on God and lean less on my own emotions. After all, emotions come and go, right?
If you are shaking your head and saying Debbie, Debbie, you are not alone. I have already looked back on the last 2 weeks and said Lord, get me well, guide me through 2020 I seem to make such a mess of it on my own. But, the one thing I do even when I make a mess of it is, OWN it. Thank God, I made it here and again may the tears we cried in 2019 water the seeds we sow in 2020! How many of you remember the old song? “Too Much Too Little Too Late” By; Johnny Mathis and Deniece Williams. that’s how I feel- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8QlAMcaOBI&fbclid=IwAR2SfzIX8VnfIap58w_SR1iHcONCLbj0ls-oJmNWg2P_xcBjhNjGI1K_FR0
Debbie
Pro 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
Pro 3:6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Pro 3:7 Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.
Pro 3:8 It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow to thy bones.
Wait on the LORD
Ann, Amen to some awesome scriptures. I hope you had a nice weekend.
Love,
Debbie
Life is such a beautiful and winding journey, and it is at times impossible to know the way to go! By keeping your heart and eyes on God and your faith…. day-by-day the future will reveal itself. You inspire daily with your smile, your words, and your sharing of life….Thank You Debbie. ♡
Raven, indeed it is. Thank you, sweetheart.
Love,
Debbie
Keeping you in my prayers dear Debbie. God alone suffices. WE all need to step back and let Him lead . I admire your strength and vulnerability letting g us follow your path, which helps others. Your many gifts are blessings to so many. May some definitive answers come to you, just as God’s perfect timing allows. Much love to you ❤
Deborah, you are right we do need to step back and let Him lead. Thank you, for your prayers.
Love,
Debbie
I really think 2020 will definitely improve for you Debbie. Postitve attitude….you got that….with God in our heart, mind and body he will give us strength to get through any thing we face….he’s right there beside us. I got through the horrible disease the “C” in 2018-2019. Now I am letting the Holy Spirit come through me more…I feel good about it! Love dear friend
Amen, Marianna, He is right there beside us every step of the way. We need Him every second of every day.
Love you too my sweet friend.
Debbie
So dear Debbie…How are you feeling today?
Do you think that this all started with allergies, before Christmas, and then when your resistance was down you caught a virus?? OR, what is your “take” on this lingering crud??? Our allergy Dr. said that things work that way, sometimes? Your bad sore throat never tested positive for strep, or did it? Anyway, praying you will be well SOON!
After rereading this post, I have some questions?
1. Have you sold your home?
2. Planning to move to an apartment?
3. Financial adviser said to NOT sell now?….
4. So, what are your plans, other than you and Mr. Shabby are going your separate ways?
After reading this a second time, I am confused! Just want to wish you God’s best as you work to sort out what plans HE has for you! I want you to know that whatever your plans are, I will keep you in my prayers, and HOPE that you can kick this “Whatever it is” illness very soon! <
Love & Prayers,
cj
C.J., I do think this started out as allergies yes. Then it got worse and by the time I was really sick, it had taken its toll. I tried to push through the holidays and should not have.
1. Yes, I had sold my home to a wonderful young couple, she grew up in this neighborhood and her parents still live here. They have a home now and are not in a hurry to move, so.
2.No, they are just way too expensive, a one-bedroom is 900.00 per month plus pet fees each month, etc. so no. I will buy a Garden Home I think.
3. Yes, he said until I buy do not rent and get less for more money much less for much more, to wait until I had found the home I loved smaller but the space I needed so I would not use any of my assets from the sale of this home and put it all down on the next one. He was right on it and correct, so I did take his advice. I have to for personal reasons stay here one more year if I am planning to buy, so one more year here then we will see. I was so ready to (as a friend said to me tear up my nest here to build my very own new one) and that day will come all in God’s time. I tried to run, rush it but God halted t for now.
4. To stay here for one more year, then start looking in the Spring of 2021.
Love,
Debbie
I am so where you are. I’m good alone and plan to stay that way! Here’s to a better 2020 for us both! Cheers
Susan, you and I will be just fine alone, we know who to turn to when we need Him.
Love,
Debbie
Oh Debbie…I pray that all things work out well for you in 2020. Life can be like a roller coaster for sure, sometimes up and sometimes down, sometimes breathtaking and other times scary, but when following HIM, we know he promises to walk along and catch us if we fall, and the Bible says that ALL things work out for those who Love and follow HIM…. What promises we have!!
(See Romans 8:28, and Jeremiah 29:11… Those are only 2 of the many verses that we can count on, during our trials.)
Get Well SOON ~ Blessings to you ~
C
Carol, you are right my friend.
Love,
Debbie
Debbie, I am learning that if I shut the clatter of my mind (EGO!) I can hear the Father’s whisper in my ear! This year is my year to have less ego and more of the Holy Spirit leading me! At least that’s what I’m striving for any way! I love how positive your words are for yourself!! You amaze me with how strong you are these days! Not that I doubted you could overcome the obstacles but you’ve shown your followers that it can be done! Happy that you have one of your earthly angels taking care of you today! Boy, when your health has been restored, look out world!😊❤️Love and blessings sweet friend!
Susan, my sweet friend, that is a great path to be on. The more we hear Him, and what he has for us, we know the better off we are. Romans 8:31: tells us “What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”
Love,
Debbie
Absolutely!! God is on our side!
Susan, Amen to that!
Love,
Debbie
Prayers that 2020 will be better for all of us! 2019 was not an easy year. My oldest son has a new girlfriend that has torn our family apart. It’s been heartbreaking. But life goes on and hopefully he’ll eventually see what’s really going on. Big hugs to you, Debbie. Thank you for your honesty. I hope 2020 is wonderful for you!
Sarah, amen, I am in agreement with you on that.
Love,
Debbie
Sounds like you are on the right track. I know it’s not easy, believe me! After being in a toxic relationship off and on for 5 years, it’s time to get off the roller coaster and focus on God and see what he has in store for me. Having anxiety issues and worry about what may or may not happen , I can relate. Wishing you the best, love and happiness to you!
Debera, anxiety is awful, I am happy you broke that toxic relationship off. None of us need that from spouses, or those we call friends, ever.
Love,
Debbie
Well said, Debbie. I hope 2020 has good things in store for you.
Thank you, Barbara!
Love,
Debbie
Debbie, I think you are on the road to feeling better all around. Not only the illness you’ve been fighting the last few weeks but your personal life as well. I can hear the positive words in your post. May God be your guide and your life be filled with happiness and love.
Kathy, thank you, I needed to hear that. I am feeling positive about new things. I am looking to God to guide me.
Love,
Debbie